How to Be a Pretty Mommy

Motherhood means sacrifice and virtue, but it also includes the cultivation of beauty. In this post we will explore how to be a pretty mommy.

Recently a few of my viewers on YouTube asked if I would address the aesthetics side of motherhood. They actually accused me of looking “put together.” Actually, I’ve always been the kind of girlie-girl that is also creatively distracted. This means I like pretty things in the abstract, and I often start the day with the best of intentions, but by the end of the day I become forgetful of my appearance and end up looking like a hot mess!

Still, I try to follow certain practices so I at least begin with beauty.

But what does “beauty” actually look like?

When we think of female beauty, there are many components. Some talk about hair, others concentrate on the figure, still others go for fashion and cosmetics.

But when we consider what makes up a classically beautiful woman, a woman that is recognized beyond the time she lived, we have something entirely different in mind. In someone such as Grace Kelly the beauty we recognize and remember is what I refer to as “presence.”

The beauty of Presence includes more than appearance, although this is part of the package.

It is that quiet, settled inner person of loving character which exudes from every pore and is demonstrated in every gesture. It isn’t pushy, or boisterous, or opinionated. It stands for truth, but without dogmatism and vitriol. It is stronger than steel, but softer than velvet.

It is virtuous and life-giving, but doesn’t think about these things much. It exists to be light–as a beacon and an illuminator for the path of others. It is compassionate, empathetic and kind.

All this without drawing attention to itself.

Without Presence, everything else is only skin-deep and fading quickly!

The natural beauty of youthfulness is like the blossom of a rose–it is glorious in its freshness, but if this is all we depend upon we will be greatly disappointed as life continues from our 20’s, to our 30’s, to our 40’s and beyond.

Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting,
But a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

Proverbs 31:30

Lasting beauty is the beauty of holiness and goodness, and this can be mimicked, but it cannot be faked.

All the traits of Presence emanate from God Himself:

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.

James 1:17

GOD RUNS A BEAUTY SHOP

We can’t get close to God without absorbing some of Him into our physical makeup.

But we all, with unveiled faces, looking as in a mirror at the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.

2 Corinthians 3:18

Think about Moses. After he had spent many days in God’s presence, his face shown with God’s glory. It shown so bright, in fact, that the people made Moses wear a veil so they wouldn’t be blinded when looking at him!

God’s complete love and acceptance allows His beauty within us to bubble up and express itself in whimsy and loveliness. Then we can take the resources available to us and use them to their most effective level.

We don’t need to spend oodles of money or time on our appearance. We only need to find what works and stick with it.

This we will call creating a “mystique.”

MYSTIQUE: A fascinating aura of mystery, awe, and power surrounding someone or something.

First of all, this “mystique” will begin as an expression of God’s favor in our lives, a taste of His glory going out to others. Then it will include certain colors, styles, even scents that others will begin to associate with us as our unique expression of His kindness and creativity.

To illustrate this idea, think of Sarah, Abraham’s wife. She was so beautiful that potentates wanted her for a wife, even as she became an older woman. She definitely had presence and a mystique that set her apart from other women.

Then there is Ruth, whose Godly character and humility was coupled with comeliness and made her irresistible to Boaz.

Of course, Esther had to have had Presence, and the favor of God caused the eunuch who cared for her to help her create a mystique that made the king buckle at the knees.

These women of the Bible were classy, elegant, and smart (sharp). They were pleasingly graceful and stylish in appearance or manner.

“But it isn’t ‘Christian’ to care too much for oneself. I feel guilty if I spend money and time on myself.”

This is silly goose thinking! When we neglect our bodies and our appearance we cause great grief to others. This is because they have to look at us (and smell us). This is not kindness towards others, but an ugly expression of religious pride.

Timeless precepts:

• Have self-respect.
• Behave with honor and dignity.

For you were bought at a price: therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s

1 Corinthians 6:20

Therefore we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making an appeal through us; we beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.

2 Corinthians 5:20

Remember, you are the spirit of the home and the one who sets the tone of your family, just like the commander of an army. When the Esprit de Corps is at a low ebb, the general cleans and shines up his uniform, mounts his stately steed, and sits up straight in his saddle as he parades before his troops. This gives them all great hope as they face the enemy and keeps away feelings of discouragement and defeat.

Coming out of the bedroom in the morning clean, fresh-smelling, and pretty is an encouragement to everyone. It helps them to fight the good fight of faith in living every day.

This doesn’t need to take a lot of money or time.

Just start with what God has already provided and don’t moil and toil in search of it.

And why do you worry about clothes? Consider how the lilies of the field grow: They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his glory was adorned like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?

Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles strive after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you.

Matthew 6:28-33

Practically speaking, just gather up what you have in your closets and drawers; your clothes, cosmetics, and accessories.

Get rid of anything:
• too old
• broken, torn, stained
• obviously ugly
• too small or too big
• mediocre (uninspiring)

Put what is left in categories:
• ratty (for painting and similar chores)
• every day (nothing frumpy or dumpy allowed)
• special

As for skin care and cosmetics:

• Pare down to the basics so you don’t have to take more than 15 minutes a day taking care of your face and skin.
• Put these supplies in a small bag or tub that is easy to store and grab in a hurry.

I personally use only water to wash my face, then I use petroleum jelly for moisturizing (I have extremely dry skin). I put on a light foundation, then add in touches of blush on my cheek bones, chin, and the bridge of my nose. After this I concentrate on my eyes, starting with a brow brush and pencil, then a dab of brown shadow, some eyeliner, and then mascara.

The final touch is some long-lasting lip-stain type lipstick so that it lasts as long as possible (my natural lip color is almost the same as my super light skin, so little color distinction is necessary).

As for the hair:

• Keep it as simple as possible without looking “severe.” When we pull our hair straight back and put it up into a tight bun, we tend to look cold and uptight.
• Frame your face and add some whisps of hair to keep things looking soft and feminine.

Long hair has been easiest for me over the years, as I could wash it, let it dry naturally, then brush it out and put some barrettes on the sides to hold it back from my face, using a curling iron on my bangs or to add some ringlets to the front. These days I use rag curls to help frame my face as an older woman, which I would not have had time for when I was younger and had younger children, but now that I have a little more time, I use rag curls!

I came to rag curls after trying all sorts of things that were pricey and hurt my head, but using simple pieces of cloth make it easy to sleep and give me gentle curls in the morning when I wake up. There are loads of tutorials online that will help you get started if you are interested.

As for wardrobe:

My grandmother taught me something when I was a teen that really stuck: keep to the classics.

Trends may come, and trends may go, but there are certain items that never really go out. Classic skirts, slacks, blouses, vests, sweaters, etc. can be found in subdued tones are great investments. Then add in some color and whimsey with accessories.

Accessories are easy–garage sales and thrift stores abound with them.

Also, always choose shapes, styles, and colors that look best on you as a unique individual, not according to what looks good on a model or is a current trend. Clothes that look great on a high-wasted woman may look awful on a long-wasted woman, and vice-versa.

Also, taking care of our clothing can make our money stretch farther, and also preserve the articles we dearly love so they will last longer. Careful laundering is basic (although I never dry clean). Washing like colors together, using the different temperatures, is still the best practice, no matter what they say on social media. After this, I hand up all of my clothing except for my underthings–which keeps my clothes looking decent without ironing.

And there is a way to enliven old clothes. First, take some time to sew up tears and holes, replacing buttons, etc. Next, use starch. Even old t-shirts can be starched, and doing this can make old clothes look brand new!

Keep only the best.

As we talked about in my post/video on keeping everything simple, getting rid of the so-so and awful will allow to see more clearly (and actually use) the things you actually love, and it will also save you loads of time and money.

A woman who seeks the Lord, and who takes care of herself as a princess of the King, will bring a bit of God’s Kingdom with her wherever she goes!

For the podcast on this subject, click on the links below:

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