Why You Can Homeschool Your Teens

So, your children are growing up. You’ve been enjoying the learning journey so far (except for maybe learning to read and long division), but the years ahead are blurry and unsure. Are you really capable of facing the years ahead? I say YES–you can homeschool your teens!

And this is from many years, and many children, of experience. So far, we have “graduated” 13 of our 15 children. All of them were homeschooled until graduation.

Here are seven helpful points to help you on your way:

#1: Don’t be afraid.

The clock is not ticking as fast as you think it is. More and more we are realizing that following the track laid out for our children must be altered so that we do not fall into the pits laid for us. All those things society says your child needs to succeed probably will not apply to you. There is no longer a straight path to success for anyone. I know you feel as though you need to prove the validity of your homeschooling choices to others, but maturity tells us to move past that.

God knows how to draw straight with crooked lines.

Doug Wilson

Yes, you will make mistakes. Remember, life is not scripted (at least in the way we have been conditioned to think). Very few people end up their lives the way they envisioned them when they were in their teens. God will still lead and guide you as you go.

For instance, when I was 16 I thought for sure I would be a missionary to Russia (then it was the Soviet Union), and here I ended up spending my adulthood homeschooling and rearing our 15 children!

#2: Question the need to put your child into public school for high school.

There may be actual reasons for public schooling high school, like having a child who is athletically (or otherwise) gifted and is looking to obtain a scholarship, or something similar.

However, I have found that most parents place their children in public school for high school because they don’t feel competent to complete their education (which you actually are more than qualified to do, but let’s get into that more later in this post).

While it is a good idea to give your child opportunities to gain confidence in social situations and become more independent, public high school is less about building confidence and gaining knowledge and more like immersing your child into a sea of confusion.

• For one thing, your child is going to be brand new to the whole public schooling machine, so, on top of feeling unsure about themselves in general, they are going to feel like fish out of water. Instead of helping them gain confidence, it could destroy their confidence altogether.

• For another thing, with this lack of confidence they are going to be on empty needing to be filled. This will make them even more vulnerable to outside societal pressures than their public schooled peers.

• Still further, public high schools do not necessarily prepare people for college (or vocation, or life). Professors and employers alike are constantly complaining about the lack of preparedness they see in new graduates.

In 2019-20, 65.4 percent of first-year undergraduate students took a remedial course in math; 42.1 percent did so in reading or writing, according to the most recent data on the subject available from the National Center for Education Statistics. That’s a big jump from just four years prior. In 2015-2016, 14 percent of first-year college students took a remedial course in math; 8.8 percent did so in reading and writing.

High School Students Think They Are Ready for College. But They Aren’t, Education Week

Public school educators agree that high schools are doing a mixed job, at best, of preparing students for college. For example, about half (47%) of high schools rate themselves as doing a very good or excellent job of preparing students for college, according to the National Center for Education Statistics.

Are High School Graduates Ready For College? Forbes

So, instead of giving your child a leg-up by putting them into public high school, you might be downgrading him and keeping him from his potential.

#3: Think of the benefits of homeschooling through the high school years.

It was at our oldest son’s wedding that I was introduced to one of his coworkers. She was a woman in her 40’s who had started working in his office and felt unwelcomed and unsure of herself. Our son sent her a sweet email to welcome her and reassure her, even though he was 20 years younger. Since then, she became his biggest fan. She made a point of telling me how wonderful our children had turned out (she knew one of our daughters as well, who also was very successful). She told us the reason they were doing so well is because they were homeschooled. She said that, instead of being bogged down by the environment and system of public schooling, they had been given the time they needed to concentrate on their specific areas of interest, so when it was time, they actually found work in their area of expertise easily.

This is one of the greatest parts of homeschooling in the high school years:

YOUR TEEN GETS THE GIFT OF TIME.

Think of all the hours public high schooling wastes on things such as travel, roll call, assemblies, class interruptions, bullying, unnecessary classes, etc. Then think of the better things your teen could be doing:

• Delving deeper into an area of interest.
• Learning who they are spiritually and emotionally by facing real-life situations.
• Taking courses they actually do need, either on line or locally.
• Working to save money towards a goal of either further education, travel, transportation, or housing.
• Travel and participation in charitable activities, such as missionary trips and local outreaches to the unreached peoples of our world.

#4: There are a lot of different ways to homeschool your teens.

Don’t be intimidated by higher math and science. If your child actually needs such things, there are multiple options available.

• Find a tutor, an online course, or a homeschool coop.
• Go to a community college and take the course as a high school student (with the potential of earning college credit).
• Remember that many careers do not require higher math or science courses. Many don’t require any college at all. Consider looking into certificates and programs for the trades.

#5: Transcripts, grade averages, and diplomas are not that hard to produce.

Your heart may race when you think of such things, but you can relax. You don’t have to change and rearrange your entire homeschool program to fit into some arbitrary idea of figuring out credits and grades. You simply go by God’s leading, just as you always have. As long as your teen is making progress in his life, as long as he is active in his own learning (and not stuck to a screen day and night), you will be fine.

Just take all the things he has studied, all the books he’s read, the discussions, the experiences, even the jobs, and count them all in.

Remember, those requirements were formulated by bureaucratic minds. They aren’t made for the people, but for the machine. The machine does not give a true picture of learning, it only helps check off boxes.

So, make a list of boxes and check them off. Then place the entire thing into the form required by the bureaucracy.

You can find forms and examples all over the Internet. Just pick one and fill it out. Then, give your child a 4.0 grade average (what I always give mine), because you know he did his best work because he was interested.

After that, design and print your own diploma. Make it as fancy or as simple as you like. Sign it. Then frame it and put it on the wall.

That’s it. The end.

#6: Test preparation can be helpful.

This is because tests are just part of our modern life. Whether your child is college-bound or not, they’re probably going to come across one or two. Why not gear them up for when one comes their way? Have them go online, or to the local bookstore, and buy their own (yes, with their own money, that way they will take it seriously) test prep book. It could be for the ASVAB, or the GED, or the SAT’s or some general college entrance exam. Then have them do a few pages a day–no more than 1/2 hour’s worth–and within a few months they will be ready to go.

#7: Some important things to remember.

• As your child grows into adulthood, your role changes. You move from keeping close track and having final control to holding them more loosely. I know this has great potential for disaster, but if you hold them too tightly, they are going to wriggle free in some possibly ugly ways. Why not start building a friendship that will last the rest of your lives?
• You need to keep from becoming reactive. They are going to make mistakes, sometimes big ones, as they are trying to figure out who they are. Expect them. Don’t get shocked by them.

Just don’t.

Keep calm, pray the gifts of the Spirit under your breath ( Galatians 5:22-23), and know that nothing thrown at you is bigger than your God!

• God doesn’t have grandchildren. No matter what perfect parents you are (which you aren’t), or how perfect their education was (which is wasn’t), their faith has to become their own. If they go through a time of questioning, don’t lose heart. Just pray, and believe, and then let go.

• If your child is being a real punk while he is figuring things out, you don’t have to put up with it. You can still have rules and requirements for the inhabitants of your home, no matter what the age. Curfews, chores, even monetary contribution is customary and often necessary in these difficult times. If they really want to become adults with adult privileges, then thinking of the needs of others before themselves should be automatic.

Two rules for the adultish-type persons in our home (which we have stuck with for the last 20 years or so): Respect and Contribute. If a child is of age and can’t abide by these two, they are welcome to leave.

As they say in A.A.:

Let go and let God.

If you’ve homeschooled your child for any amount of time, you’ve been given a great gift.

You’ve participated in watching him go from wiggling to giggling to learning to drive. My husband and I, even after the hard work (and often heartache) of rearing our own 15, would not have had it any other way.

If you are interested in listening to a podcast on this subject, click below:

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